Your Weekly Antics, It Takes a Village & Possibly Part of a School Bus Edition...8/31/25

Well kids, school is back, and with that busses and school traffic. Despite my usual warning of the pending start of school, I hope you all figured it out on your own, got it together and planned your routes to work accordingly. If you didn’t, I don't know what to tell ya, I suck. I was dropping the youngest Kap kid off at UConn last week and was a bit preoccupied. Exhibit 1 is how Harley feels about Meri being off to college. Here’s what I’ve got…

1. With the start of the school year, that means for many of you parents out there, you’re back to making school lunches. Heard on the radio today and followed up on google to confirm so not to spread falsities, that there has been a Hostess Ding Dong recall due to mold contamination. Gross. Initially I thought to myself, damn, Ding Dongs are still around, and people still eat them? Second thought was, we’ve been lied to once again, and here’s where I’m going with that...but before I do, here's the link in case you don't believe me that Ding Dongs should not be on your grocery list.

Hostess Ding Dongs Recall 2025 Over Potential Mold Contamination - Newsweek

2. Anyone remember the myth or tale of less truths that was once told that Twinkies had a shelf like of something like 20 years? Naturally Ding Dongs as an ultra over processed chemical filled food would fall in the same category. If you grew up in the 80’s, this may sound familiar to you. Perhaps this tale started because of being inundated by the news of poor relations with Russia and the fear of nuclear war. We all saw the movie Red Dawn, the original one, and knew if we were going to end up living underground unsupervised for an extended amount of time, we were doing so with a stash of Twinkies, Devil

Dogs and Coke, a kid’s gotta eat.

3. Delving further into the myths of Hostess Twinkies, Ding Dongs and the like, we discovered that there have been individuals here, there and everywhere who have studied and tested the shelf life of a Twinkie and pinpointed how long they can last and still be considered edible. Some note that after a period of time the Twinkie is similar in appearance to that of a mummified finger. Other studies note that they crumble and turn to dust. I don’t need to conduct a study people, I think the common man should be able to take one look at one of those things in their shiny clear wrappers and tell that it’s old, there’s something wrong with it, and shouldn’t be eaten, it’s not rocket science. Regardless, studies conducted and indicate that despite all the additives, emulsifiers, and other chemicals thrown into a Twinkies, Ding Dongs or whatever else Hostess has to offer by means of sweet treats, they only have a shelf life up to 45 days. After that you’re taking your chances. Again, plan accordingly.

4. Speaking of planning accordingly, there has been speculation (by me,) that perhaps the mouse infiltration of last week was devised by Al, who was sick of complaining about the state the interior of the jeep was always in, and maybe this mouse was a plant, to instill fear in me to clean the interior until everything sparkled. The probability of this theory is high as he commented several times what a great job I did cleaning it after the discovery of that rotten mouse carcass who went over the rainbow bridge while living in my car. Serves the son of a bitch (the mouse, not Al,) right if you ask me.

 5. With that said, I’m happy to report that so far this week I am mouse free and perhaps the freeloading lodger who met his untimely demise in my vehicle did in fact not have any friends. Or, his friends saw how he made out when choosing my vehicle as his means of alternative housing and decided to make better life choices. If you do have any stray Twinkies, Ding Dongs, half eaten sandwiches or wrappers with remnants of food on them, clean that junk out now so not to give the wrong impression that those little bastards are welcome. Learn from the Antics people…learn from us.  

6. Often in life it takes a village. The right people being in the right place at the right time. It takes a village to keep your kids on the straight and narrow. Takes a village to get them off to school. Takes a village to help them adjust to new experiences and help them see that they too can overcome their hesitancies and fears and come out on the other side better for it. Sometimes your village consists of some whom you would least expect, or those who may be the product of the fabulous upbringing of one of your longest lifelong friends. You know who you are, I have the best village ever. 🤡

7. So, if you have a friend who tells you that it’s not a good idea to buy the front end of a bus to add to the haven you have established for yourself in your back yard, perhaps you should listen. Regardless of how spectacular it may look, you better have pre planned and ensured that the front of that bus is big enough to house the bed you’ll be sleeping in when your better half kicks your ass out. The only help I can provide to you is two open bunkbeds should you decide you don’t fare well in the outdoors and would prefer not to be eaten by mosquitos or the stray wildlife the Woo has to offer. I don’t know what to tell you friend, I’m doing the best I can as one of your villagers to help you make better life choices and shocker Angel, you don’t listen.

8. One of my inner circle who’s always looking out for me dropped off a new duck to add to my collection. Exhibit 2, the coffee drinking duck. This is not a picture of the actual duck; he’s already in the jeep and I’m far too lazy to run outside to take a picture. This loyal Antics reader reported that this one was purchased because she couldn’t find a social worker duck. I too have been unable to locate a rubber duck dedicated soley to those who do the work of the people, that’s why I purchased the middle finger duck way – back – when, in its place. Close enough.

9. I would be remiss if I did not mention that I also have little duck people who flim flam their parents into buying me ducks whenever they run across them as well. I would love to show the duck Rory left for me here in Exhibit 3, but Harley in her rage and disdain over the summer being over, her kid going back to teaching, the oldest Kap kid heading back to Boston, the youngest Kap kid flying the coop, and having already chewed up the couch, she did what all good dogs do who can’t talk, she ate it. Exhibit 3, Harley’s continued disgust with being stuck home with me all day.

10. As promised, Exhibit 4, our annual 1st day of school picture. Doesn't matter how old this crew gets, where they are in the country, if they're still in school or out in the real world earning a living, they humor me, get together and facetime to make sure the back to school photo happens. They do my heart good. ❤️

    
    
    
    

 And last but not least, if you have that extra day off this weekend for Labor Day, make excellent use of your time and do something good for yourselves, you deserve it!

Have a great week!