Your Weekly Pandemic Antics May Edition 5/21/20

Your weekly update in Pandemic Antics…

1. I’d like to personally thank the board for our bonus. It went directly to Tufts…

Harley 1, Chipmunks 0

2. We've moved on from weather and pollen counts to bird feeders. Nothing like encouraging the chipmunks to taunt the dogs.

3. Living in close proximity to your neighbors in the Woo is underrated...once you get the code to your neighbors universal remote for his tv...(this is what I've heard anyway...)

4. I've updated the message on my voice mail..."If you're not going to help me, help you, please do not bother leaving me a message..."

5. To the woman who walks by my yard every afternoon and is nasty to my dogs...my super soaker 5000 arrived from amazon yesterday - I'm ready for ya, BRING IT.

6. I'm sorry that you're not happy with the tone of voice being used by the essential workers who are going to work every day to ensureyour safety at the shelter…I’ll get right on that. And while I’m at it, I’ll make sure to secure that bench for you at Beaver Brook Park.

7. In case you're wondering, you can order rice cakes, in bulk, from amazon...it's now like Hanukkah in May at Marshall's house.

8. Dr. G, he’s really not that fun. Funny how restraining orders will do that to a person. You follow a guy once, or twice, or okay, maybe every day and then bam...you're served.

9. TIMMMMMM!!!! Has anyone checked on Tim? I don’t think he reads these updates. I know he loves us, but he's immune to my foolishness.

10. Remember people...wearing masks is sort of like wearing mittens. You can flip someone off and no one will see, but you'll still get the satisfaction. Same goes for the masks...no one sees what you're saying and as far as everyone knows or sees, you're still holding it together. And plant some flowers…it’ll make you feel better.