Your Weekly Antics Practice a Little Bit of Grace Edition...6-2-22

Well kids, here we are in June, halfway through the year. And what a half year it's been so far. The powers that be have reported that technically we are in the count down phase of our fearless leaders final days until retirement, but I'm still in denial, so I'm not counting squat - don't ask me. I'll climb out of my denial phase when she stops returning calls and texts because she's gotten herself a burner phone. That's when s**t gets real. Here's what I've got...

1. Believe it or not kids, way back in the day I may have had some trouble staying quiet when in school. I may have liked to talk – a lot – which often, okay always, resulted in my receiving F’s in Conduct and Effort and an occasional exasperated call home to Sue Miller telling her, to tell me, to get my act together - ask Ken Nosek, he may or may not have personal knowledge of this fact. One of my teachers in the 7th grade (not Mr. Nosek, he happily surrendered and gave in to my lifes work of in person torment a long long time ago...) went so far as to tell me that due to my excessive talking, I would grow up to be of no positive impact or contribution to society and would eventually result to nothing. Harsh, right? In his defense, I’m sure I made him crazy. I ran in to him years later, as an adult, in line at the bank. I made sure to re-introduce myself and tell him what I did for a living. I reminded him of what he said and let him know that despite his concern that I’d grow up to be a sociopath or burden on society, that I in fact did not, and that the world does need talkers; there are employers and professions in the world who need those of us who have the gift of gab. Not only do I talk a lot Mr. so -and-so, but now I get paid for it…how do you like that? So for you exasperated teachers, parents and caregivers out there who have been gifted with a child who struggles to keep her mouth shut, remember this…some day she may grow up to be your Social Worker who has been tasked with talking you out of a wet paper bag helping you to stay housed, keep your lights on or keep you from being financially exploited and shipped off prematurely to the Nursing Home. Don’t be so quick to shut that kid up...you may need her some day.

2. Now, as that kid, I remember getting grounded. Telling my Mother that I really didn’t see what the problem was, because despite my conduct and effort grades, my class grades were great. How could I get an F in effort, but an A in class work? Because of course, I had an answer for everything. She quickly reiterated that perhaps that F in effort was due to my lack of effort to keep my mouth shut. Okay Sue Miller, that's fair, you may have been on to something.

3. I’ll admit, that there are instances where excessive talking is frowned upon and may cause you some trouble. Case in point, Marshall. I met my match the day I met him. He likes to talk and talk and talk and that's why we love him. Marshall can single handedly talk his way out of any situation and has an answer for everything. We haven’t talked about Marshall for a bit because he’s been doing his own thing and staying out of trouble. Well kids, his roommate Jerry got sprung and he now has a new roommate, or I should clarify, a string of new roommates who don’t appreciate Marshall’s love for the English language, his ability to talk about anything at any time, extract your life story from you without you even realizing it, what's been happening with the Red Sox and so on - he’s managed to talk them all out of his room, causing himself quite the predicament. This time last year Marshall lost his ability to speak, struggled to get his point across and worked hard to get that speech back, so I say remember those days, I certainly do, and cut the guy some slack. Be careful what you wish for people - what you wish would stop may be the very thing you wish you had back. And it could always be worse. He could be throwing trays at your head like Gramma Edie does or start walking the halls of the facility like Naked Joan - you early readers of The Antics remember Naked Joan, don't you? Pick your poison people. If Agnes, Chad, Dave and I can keep up with Marshall, so can the rest of you. #becarefulwhatyouwishfor #stopsquelchinghisjoy #Agnesisasaint

4. Do they still do a version of the bubble testing in the schools that is supposed to help students determine what their career path should be? I certainly hope not. According to my bubble test with my number 2 pencil back around 1987 ish, I was destined to be a school bus driver. Not that there’s anything wrong with that – bus drivers are a much needed profession, one I personally believe doesn’t pay enough. They’re stuck carting other peoples ungrateful, unruly children to and from school every day for little pay, little credit, and big headaches. Clearly those bubble testing results could not anticipate ones driving record, so good thing I didn't listen to what those recommendations said or I would've been responsible for driving some of your kids to school every day. Let me repeat that...I would have been responsible for driving a bus full of kids to school - no one wants me driving their kid to school, never mind a bus full of strangers kids to school. So, to that guidance counselor who said I should be a bus driver, thank God I didn't listen...look at all the kids I would've endangered over the years ... it's bad enough I'm in charge of improving the lives of the elderly.

*** And with that said, it's almost the end of the school year people - get your kids bus driver a gift for crying out loud, and not something lame, something decent, like a gift certificate to a restaurant that serves a lot of alcohol, they've earned it.

5. Word on the street is that there was a sighting of the oldest Kap kid at Crumbl Cookie. This is a direct violation of the cookie code. I would have provided photo evidence of this violation, but I didn’t want to jeopardize our sources. We protect the anonymity of our sources at all costs here at The Antics – okay sometimes, or never, as you'll see in this exhibit- it takes a village to get this all together every week… What we will tell you is this - the Crumbl Cookie faux pas took place in Nashville TN. The kid was on the road, maybe he got hungry and had a hankering for a cookie, we’ll give him a pass, but then I find out this…he took part in eating said cookies at a recent engagement party he attended and admitted it. Whatever. May as well call Walter and Angel and you three can establish some stupid little cookie club and have them join you next time you go and purchase the Devils sweets. That crosses a line right into traitorous territory my friends. That crosses a line. Exhibit 1, no remorse.

6. Speaking of villages, feast your eyes on this. I was called out on the carpet last week kids, forgetting to mention this duo had connected while out for dinner one night a few weeks ago. Exhibit 2, Janice and Sue Miller. This could be trouble, this could be spreading good will, this could be solving the worlds problems - who knows, it could really go any way people, just depends on how the cookie crumbles...that's right, I'm still hung up on the whole cookie thing.

7. Exhibit 3...What did the Turkey do when it crossed the road? Who the hell knows... but check this out, in the crosswalk even, perhaps giving its own turkey version of The Beatles, Abbey Road. Let's acknowledge that turkey's seem to be a common theme here at The Antics as of late, but in our defense, why are there so many turkeys strutting around city streets? We saw this guy in Boston and he was on a mission. At least he's following the rules of the road, being a good pedestrian and using the crosswalk. Maybe he's on his way to his local cookie joint. Yup, I'm still at it. Exhibit 4, for comparison to Exhibit 3...

8. What's worse than 3 cats staring at you on a home visit? Ten. Ten cats staring at you on a home visit. Staring right through your soul from the perches they've made from kitchen counters, and tables. From under beds and couches. Close enough to see your every move, but far enough out of your reach. I think they give me these reports just to mess with me...

9. The yell heard around the Woo Wednesday night at approximately 10:11 pm. The recovery of the lost earring that found its way in to Helen's heel. Again, careful what you wish for. You pray to St. Anthony... something's lost that must be found, please St. Anthony look around...that's all well and good but if St. Anthony's going to take the time out of his busy schedule to help you find something, beggars can't be choosers - you never know when that lost item will appear, and how that something will show up. There are only so many requests the guy can take. There were no injuries caused in the happy event that was the discovery of the lost earring in the 02 - order has been restored at the Bibeau homestead. Exhibit 5 the recovered earring.

10. It's official...our fearless leader may have lost her mind, or is completely checked out in her final days towards retirement - I won't give you a count down because I remain in denial - and/or is messing with all of us...I will be left, unattended, back at the office today as part of the skeleton crew while others attend our yearly all day long retreat/training. I, a long with another co worker, will be the temporary faces of the Protective Services Unit - I will leave my co worker unnamed as not to drag his good name through the mud. Chaos may ensue - God help us all. I refuse to take any reports between the hours of 8 and 5. Keep it together people, be nice to your elders and do not call me.

And last but not least, I hope that people have sucked less lately and things are starting to turn around. If not, and you continue to be disappointed and disheartened, I'll leave you with this...practice some grace. A term I heard a long time ago that has come up a few times in recent months. For those of you who may not be familiar with the term it is as follows....

When we show grace to others, it's about showing kindness to someone else even when they don't deserve it. Grace is going out of our way to give your compassion, kindness and love to someone even if they might not appreciate it, or return the favor.

Practice a little bit of grace from time to time - some day you too may need it - this may benefit you far more than you realize.

Have a great weekend!