Your Weekly Antics - Let's Set Things Straight About Our Coastal Gem...3-30-23

Well kids, let's talk about Worcester – if asked to describe Worcester I would not use the term, a hidden coastal gem. This is how our city was described in an article that was talking about Worcester and all the reasons why one should make our city a destination to travel to. For starters, I may be geographically challenged, but even I know that unless an ocean was dropped in the middle of downtown somewhere that I didn’t know about, our fine city is about a 90 minute drive, if you’re doing the speed limit, to anything resembling an ocean. Unless of course one is referring to Lake Quinsig or Coes Pond, I beg to differ, and the Boston Harbor doesn’t count so don’t even go there. We speak the truth here in the Woo and this article was shared with many who know, love and live here - below are some of the thoughts and suggestions should we ever be asked for the real deal on Worcester. We pride ourselves in presenting our readers with solid facts, the God's honest truth and allowing voices to be heard…below is some of the feedback we received. Here's what I've got...

1. When traveling by car, don't be a fool and be sucked in by the allure of Park Ave. Should this happen, be prepared for your patience to be tested, especially during morning and evening rush hour traffic. Everyone has somewhere to be, yesterday, has something more important to get to than you, is the only person running late, and it's every man for themselves. Do not expect anyone to do anything but slam on their breaks, run red lights and cut you off - God forbid anyone allows you to merge or that there ever be a day that you enjoy a relaxing trip down Park Ave...that trip does not exist. Whether it's roadwork or just that jack wagon who's sat through 3 green lights trying to take a left on to Chandler or Highland Streets, no one cares that you have somewhere to be. It's survival of the fittest. Good luck and Godspeed.

2. When traveling Lincoln Street, be prepared to dodge pedestrians who have no regard for moving vehicles. Crosswalks are ignored, crossing against a green light is the norm and wandering out in to moving traffic is like a sport up there. There are no rules followed on Lincoln Street and those walking out in to moving traffic have no fear of you or your moving motor vehicle. Take the long way around folks and avoid Lincoln Street at all costs.

3. Museums - The Worcester Historical Society is a fun spot to check out - do so - there's always something new and fun to see. There's the Worcester Art Museum, you can catch a show at the Hanover Theater, or a band at the Palladium or the DCU. Then there's Bancroft Tower nestled in the woods between Salisbury Street and Park Ave that used to be a spot for illegal activities, has since cleaned up its act and now serves as a picturesque back drop for Prom and wedding photos. Feel like going for a hike? Wander on up the hill to Bancroft Tower towards the end of the day and enjoy a pretty sunset, but be out of there before dark or you'll get busted and thrown in the clink.

4. The Newton Square Rotary – it’s a free for all. No one knows, follows, or respects the laws of rotary traffic here in Worcester. It’s everyone for themselves. If you're lucky, you'll see a lovely woman who has made it a regular thing to stand roadside with her boom box from 1983 and a hoola hoop, singing, dancing and hoola hooping to her hearts content. Go get it sister - you're the only reason I still drive through that chaos in hopes of seeing you living your best life. That should be listed as an event not to miss when visiting the Woo.

5. Be prepared to suffer a migraine or some kind of physical illness while attempting to navigate the new Kelly Square Peanut – just because it looks nicer doesn’t mean that it works any better. If all else fails, go old school, shut your eyes and gun it...#bringbackkellysquare

6. As long as you don't mind geese, Elm Park is a beautiful park and deserves a stroll. We would suggest you stroll within the park and not on the outskirts of the park if you don't want to be submerged in, you guessed it, the ludicrousy that is Worcester traffic. Should you decide you're up for it and walk on the sidewalks that surround Elm Park along Park Ave, Highland Street, Elm Street and Russell Street, this walk is approximately 2000 steps and just under a mile of all flat walking. You may pick up some new slang or swears you have never heard before being screamed from one car to another as people continue to attempt to turn left on to Highland Street at the corner of Park Ave. which has been banned for quite some time...but again, we don't follow driving rules here in the city - we do what we want. If we want to take a left, we take a left...it doesn't matter who's driving behind us or what the signs say. Consider this added entertainment as you take in the sunshine and exhaust of traffic while getting your steps in.

7. Polar Park – ah yes, the newest shiniest penny that's smack dab in the middle of the city. Some of us working with the homeless population look at that stadium and think, thank goodness all that space was used to build a ball park and parking and unaffordable housing…who needs to house those living in camps in the woods, under bridges and in our parks? This was a much better way to serve our citizens. Let's build another park on another parcel of buildable land instead of building affordable housing - it worked out so great we should do it again.

8. Should you venture on down to Polar Park, support our local business's while you're down there and enjoy the Canal District. The Crompton Collective, Seed to Stem, Birchtree Bread and more - all worth a stop. Infused Cafe on Harding Street just opened up in the Fidelity Bank Ice Center and are just getting their feet wet - they too are worth a stop. This is not just any old coffee shop people, this cafe is owned and operated by two 20 year old Worcester residents who are also products of our Worcester Public Schools - doing what they love serving up some tasty healthy food choices and delightful coffee. Be proud of these kids for taking a chance, doing what they love and show them some support by stopping by - it's worth the trip.

9. When venturing out to try some of the places we're suggesting, be prepared to be harassed by panhandlers at every – single – intersection throughout the city and when coming off of any of the ramps from rte 290. Try not to run anyone over. That'll hold you up and you'll never get to any of these recommended destinations.

10. Green Hill - underrated. Beautiful grounds, although hilly, it's a gorgeous place to walk when the weather allows. Stop by the Worcester's Vietnam Veterans Memorial or the petting zoo. If golf's your thing, swing by another underrated gem, the Greenhill Golf course, play a round or sit back and enjoy the flurry of activity. This 18 hole course is the home course for the Worcester Girls High School Golf team. Greenhill is good to our kids, so let's return the favor and the love and be sure to give them your business.

And last but not least...now that it's nicer out, friends of The Antics like Matt Noponen are preparing to get their motorcycles out. While navigating our city streets to check out all of the destinations we've shared with you, be mindful and courteous of our bikers

...they've got a lot less metal between themselves and the city streets than you and your cars do - we'd like them to remain in one piece. And for those tried and true Red Sox fans out there, Happy Opening Day!!!

Have a great weekend!