Your Weekly Antics, Don't Be a Jerk Edition...1-4-2024

January is off to a running start kids, let’s remind ourselves how to be decent human beings. If you're reading this, I guarantee that you are already a decent human, but read on anyway to remind yourself that despite what everyone else may be saying, you're doing all right for yourself. Also…if by chance you are seeing this on Facebook, make sure you subscribe to The Antics mailing list…apparently The Antics have been flagged for being a risk to cyber security. Who knew? Here’s what I’ve got…

1. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. If someone says something hurtful, stupid or inconsiderate to you, keep in mind that maybe they're not regular readers of The Antics and don't know any better.

2. If you buy a Jeep, for the love of God and all that’s holy, wave to other Jeeps. This is a thing, and in my opinion should be discussed when signing your purchase and sales agreement. If you don’t agree to wave to other Jeeps, someone somewhere should show up at your house and take your Jeep back.

Exhibit 1, duck love spread by my little buddies the Gagne kids. They get the Jeep thing and they don't even drive.

3. Don’t drive hungry, angry or tired. All three have the potential to create rage and unsafe driving conditions. It isn't the guy next to you at the red lights problem that you haven’t eaten anything since breakfast, are pissed that your toaster is broken and that you didn’t sleep well. Stay home and get yourself together before you get on the road. After all, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Hasn't anyone read Dr. Suess?

4. Stand up for yourself. You can only turn the other cheek for so long and are not doing yourself or anyone else any favors by allowing people to walk all over you. This is a tough one because sometimes we confuse this practice, aka self preservation, with being mean, selfish or to lack understanding of others feelings and needs. It is not okay to allow yourself to be treated poorly, so stop.

Exhibit 2, Hank the Mantle Fish and his new tree. Hank is not a jerk. If you're like Hank, you too can get yourself a mantle tree.

5. Be kind. This next one may be cliché and the new phrase that's thrown around all the time, but I'll say it anyway. You have no idea what is going on in the lives of other people and what it took for that person to get up, dressed, and out the door that day. Not everyone has to be happy all the time. Sometimes people just need a break and a little bit of grace - be that person who cuts someone some slack.

Exhibit 3, Gibson checking his look in the mirror before he resumes digging up the yard.

6. Practice what you preach, do as you say, and all that. For example...next time I'm out and about decaffeinated and on an empty stomach, I will think twice about being a discourteous driver. It's not the fault of the guy who is driving 15 mph down Pleasant Street with no place to be, that I left for somewhere late. He didn't tell me to finally pull out of my driveway at the same time my appointment was scheduled for. I'll breathe, count down from 10 and remind myself I need to get my act together so I'm not running late all the time. Unless of course I see Don Peter's out walking...I will definitely speed up, honk and wave like a loon, because it's fun. We can't expect change over night people, I'm only human.

Exhibit 4, because we could all use a Lego army...

7. If you see a wrongdoing, for crying out loud do something or say something about it. Quit being a wimp. Unless of course the wrongdoing in question involves bribing your Great Granddaughters to sneak nips of brandy in to the nursing home for you - Exhibit 5, the brandy pact.

8. It’s okay to not follow the crowd as well as it is to decide you’re also not the leader. It is perfectly acceptable to swim upstream at a pace that’s comfortable for you. If someone else says differently, smile and wave and go about your business. No one knows what’s going on in your head or how you operate, and you don't owe anyone an explanation. If they don't like it, tell them to beat it and find another pond to float around in.

9. Do what makes you happy, you don’t need to explain yourself to anyone but yourself. This will not excuse your actions should you decide to rob a bank or become a serial killer, you’re smarter than that. Be like a member of the Kap pack...you want to run around aimlessly chasing squirrels all day and knocking pickets out of the fence? Have at it, It's your yard.

10. In addition to being kind to and taking care of yourself, do something nice or say something nice to someone else every – single – day. Trust me on this one...it doesn't take long, it doesn't have to cost you anything, and it’ll make you feel better.

Exhibit 6, the Kap pack.

And last but not least, let this be the year that you quit being so hard on yourself. The world is hard enough as it is, be one of your own best supporters for a change. There are billions of people in the world who unfortunately throughout your life will be there to knock you down and tell you that you’re a shmuck, let them, but stop telling yourself that.

Have a great weekend!